Fresh starts

Mason and I are moving!  We got an apartment that I can afford all on my own and will be moving the beginning of November.  I'm super duper excited and can't wait.  Patience has never been my strong suit but I'm trying.

Mason's 7 weeks old now and laughed for the first time yesterday.  Of course he'd just made what we refer to as "Mason's split pee poop soup" for mommy and was probably laughing AT me instead of WITH me but I'll take it.  Cutest sound ever.

When we went to the doctor for his cold they weighed him and he's up to 10lbs 3oz!  We go for 2 month shots in a couple weeks.  Time is FLYING.

He's really strong and loves to pull on your fingers and try to pull himself up.  He holds his head up really well and his legs kick constantly.  He's started pushing up with his legs and I'm pretty sure he's going to LOVE a johnny jump up when he's big enough for one.

He's still got all of that awesome hair and his eyes are lightening up and seem to be headed towards my blue which I'm pretty excited about.

Ryan and I have filed our divorce and long story short are waiting on the Judge's approval.  Then we move on.

New apartment, divorce and a perfect baby... Life is looking up.

 

Helping mom get ready for work this morning...I guess it was hard work!

 

 

7 crazy awesome weeks

Can you believe it's been 7 weeks since this little monster made his way into the world?  It's been amazing and I wouldn't trade a second of it for anything.  Here's to you little man...adventure on!

The terrifying first cold..

Whoof it's been a long couple of weeks.  Poor little Mason got his first cold.  Unfortunately mommy got one at the same time.  I tell you what...you really wish for a second, third and maybe 10th set of arms when you're a single mom with a head cold and a sick baby!  I've never felt so helpless as when the little guy looked at me with that sad little face and practically begged me with those big blue eyes to make it feel better.  That's my job right?  Mommy the fixer.  And telling him that I can't fix it...explaining to him that I can squirt saline up his nose, suck the boogies out with that mean blue bulby thing, prop him up and run the humidifier...but I can't just make it better.  Feeling like he's blaming me for that, regardless of how unreasonable it is to feel that way....for hecks sake he's a month and a half old.  He's blissfully unaware of the human ability to place blame.  Giving him every minute I can of snuggles and doing my best to make him comfortable while his tiny little body fights off the oogies.  Second guessing everything...is he propped up enough?  Is it too much?  Is it going to hurt his neck or is he going to slip down and get burried under his blankie?  OMG I'm going to kill him by trying to keep him warm!  Rediculous crazy thoughts right?  Totally.  But the world is terrifying when you have a baby!  Some moms are super strong rock stars and some second guess EVERYTHING...I'd like to say I'm right in the middle.  Oh!  Don't forget the worry that I'm the one who got him sick.  Did I bring home some horrible germs and infect my baby?!  Bad mommy.  Bad.

Enter logic.  Mason was born at the end of summer so he's too young when fall and winter hit for any of the good drugs that mask the symptoms and help make it bearable to be sick.  His babysitter's daughter goes to school and could have come into contact with any number of oogies, or we could have found them in the grocery store, the doctor's office...who knows!  Covering him with a blankie is NOT going to kill him and he's going to let me know if he's propped in a way that makes him uncomfortable.  This is when I look in the mirror and yell GET A GRIP MOMMY.

Fast forward two weeks and we feel much better.  WE lived.  Who'd have thought.

Waaa waaa waaa says the mommy

For some reason this post from September 9th didn't publish. An update on my condition is that it's not in hernia but a blood clot, my incision is finally healing, and the blood clot will reabsorb on its own. No worries.

Here's the post:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Wanna hear my latest drama?

I think I have a hernia. I've never had one but I have a knot the size of a golf ball above my incision (which is still somewhat infected), the knot is tender to the touch and it's not going away.

Day before yesterday I was sitting in the recliner and they sat my darling niece on my lap, which is the best I can do because I can't lift the wiggly 4-month old. (she's such a ball of adorable fun that it's sooo hard to not pick her up and play with her!)  She was getting sleepy so I turned her around and started rocking her. She decided to fight me and kicked me squarely in the owie/guts. Lets just say ouch is an understatement.  I couldn't figure out why it hurt soooo bad because she didn't kick my incision, she kicked above it.  So I was feeling my lower abdomen that night to try to isolate the main source of the pain and that's when I found the lump.

Best part? (Enter sarcasm)
This is my last week off work and when this week's over I'll also be completely out of sick leave, vacation days AND comp time. So, in short, I don't friggin have TIME for a hernia.
And to add insult to injury my sister and her little family go back to Washington Tuesday. Super-duper sad face.

BUT...
The beautiful part of being Mason's mommy is that even as I type this he's snoozing away in his cradle and I'm so full of love for my little angel that I'm not even mad at my situation. I couldn't have imagined a love this big and pure a month ago. Mind = blown. 

A quick minute...

Guess who is 4 weeks old already!  It seems like it happened all of a sudden...like I blinked and its passed us by.  The 4 week mark means I have to go back to work...Monday is the dreaded first day back. It would be easy to lose my weekend to the dread of Monday but I'm trying to focus on the amazing 4 weeks I've just experienced instead of the upset of what's coming.

Mason's growing like a weed.  He's got himself a little Buddha belly and it's adorable.  His big cheeks make his smile all that more precious and he's making all sorts of new noises, coos and such.  He's sleeping an average of 3 hours between feedings at night and if I play my cards right he only gets me up twice.  We're trying "dream" feeding, which is where you put them down and once they're asleep you feed them (carefully) while they sleep and it helps them stay fuller and sleep longer before the first wake up of the night.  He's getting the hang of it. :)  

He's bumped up to 4 ounce bottles and during the day eats every 2-3 hours.  He's definitely a growing boy. I got on mom's scale with him day before yesterday and he weighed in at exactly 9 pounds.  Love my little Moo.  

He smiles a lot and loves to stare at shadows and shapes.  He's a pacifier baby and loves his wubbanubs (pacifiers with stuffed animals attached...he has Dino the Dinosaur and Leo the Lion).  He's a great snuggler and is starting to really like tummy time.  He holds his head up really well but isn't quite sure what to do with it from there.  He's very strong and has gained a lot of strength in his arms and legs in the last couple weeks. He "flops" a lot less now than he used to.

His eyes are a beautiful blue still and he's still got a full head of hair.  His eyes and his hair are lightening up and I'm excited to see what he ends up with.  His hair gets really fluffy after his baths and reminds me of a hedgehog.  Fitting, right?  He seems to like his baths in his tub, but isn't a fan of sink baths or sponge baths. 

He's still hopelessly addicted to his hands and they're always at his face.  He does this adorable thing when you put a paci in his mouth where one hand automatically goes to the paci and the other goes up and plays with his ear or hair.  It reminds me of Prince John on the Disney cartoon Robin Hood...

We had some help from a friend (Thanks Melissa Blue!) yesterday and managed to get some great 1 month shots.  He's just so easy to be around and even easier to take pictures of because he's not only adorable but he's also very expressive.  I can't help but think I've hit the lotto with this kid.  He's pretty cool.

Here are the pictures that Gene Russell's studio took while we were still in the hospital and then the pictures we took yesterday for his one month.  :)  

In these 4 photos he was 2 days old.

These are the one month pictures from yesterday.

It's so cool.  Every day I wake up and wonder what he's going to do next.  I can't wait to watch this kid grow up.

A Mother's Prayer

I came across this today.  It's almost as perfect as my little boy.

A Mother’s Prayer

I hold you in my arms

And together we softly sway

As I rock you to sleep

And this is what I pray:

I pray for your safety

Your health and happiness, too

I ask God to wrap you in his love

In Everything You do

I pray you’ll never know

A single ounce of pain

That you carry no burden

And that you smile through the rain

I pray you have the will

To make all your dreams come true

And that you find success

In all you set out to do

I pray for your future

One that I hope is bright

And if you have the choice

To always do what’s right

I pray you have peace

And love inside your heart

Not just for yourself

But for those less fortunate than you are

I pray you grow into a person

Who values those you love

And that loyalty and honesty

Are not just things you speak of

I pray so many things for you

Because I love you so

Because you are a little piece of me

My heart and my soul

Wild and crazy Pennsylvania

Little boys are such an adventure.
Starting with birth you're dealing with things that little girls couldn't even think of. I'm sure that little girls have adventures all their own but only my experience is this little boy...and his little fire hose, which has a mind of its own.  I seem to be at war with my son's weewee...And it's winning.
Let's talk circumcision. You get to see them in pain and are not able to do anything about it. It's completely heart breaking. There's no baby Tylenol to be given, no shot of whiskey to calm their little nerves. Apparently whiskey's frowned upon... Who knew?  They just suffer through it.
The nurse said it feels like a really bad sunburn. Then it blisters over with the goo it oozes (did I mention it's disgusting?) and eventually, in 7-10 long days, it's all better.
The best part is the Vaseline. You get to coat the front of the diaper with Vaseline so his little dingaling doesn't stick to the diaper while its healing. Anyone who knows anything knows that Vaseline wicks moisture. Coating the diaper with moisture wicking vaseline keeps it from doing its job. I'm here to tell you that the pee has to go somewhere. Truth be told, it goes everywhere.
My darling Mason is on his 8th set of clothes for the day, if you count this mornings change on yesterday's tally. Its 1:30 in the morning and I have no sheets on my bed. There's a blanket, which was recently washed due to a mishap with another diaper change, on top of the mattress and that will totally work for now. I'm way beyond being picky. His little fire hose decided to go astray on this most recent diaper change and christen my sheets.  Technically they're mom and dad's sheets since I'm still staying at their house, in their room.  (Mason says he's sorry Grandma, and he's sure his mommy will wash them first thing.) Of course she will. Mommy lives for laundry, diapers and bottles these days.  Mommy also lives for silly smiles, new exciting baby noises and incredibly sweet snuggles.  It's a give and take, an even balance, and I wouldn't trade it for the world, pee and all.
I was texting with my sister Kellie tonight and discussing options to try and prevent having to change his clothes along with every diaper change.  I could coat gauze with vaseline and wrap his little weewee with the gauze.  Or I could coat the little penis itself with vaseline instead of the diaper.  Lets think this over though.  Would you want someone touching your sunburned private parts 10 times a day? Not me.  No thanks.
Anyways, in all this discussion my phone auto corrected "penis" to Pennsylvania. We decided that I had just accidentally named his penis Pennsylvania. That's a new one.  Wonder if it will stick? No pun intended.
;)
See why I named my blog Adventures in Mommyhood? Lord help me.